Stuff That Go Boom And Splode - Bestselling DVD In America
Stuff that go Boom and Splode is now officially the bestselling DVD series of all time, narrowly beating longtime record-holder Tits dat Jiggle und Wiggle volumes 4-32. What's the secret? We let the series' producer, Handy Protoplasm, explain:
"We did some market research and found that people in general, and Americans in particular, like watching stuff explode. They blow stuff up all the time in action movies, but they waste money on stars' salaries and screenwriting and other nonsense. We figured we could make about a trillion dollars if we cut out things like dialogue and plot development and just got right to what people want to see: stuff that explodes. None of that extra bullshit. But it can't be just any explosions. For instance, test audiences didn't really like watching cute things explode. So we stayed away from blowing things up like babies, kittens, and sumo wrestlers. But no one really has a problem when we explode ugly things, so we stick to those. We've blown up plenty of hippos, alligators, and humor writers. Interestingly enough, people didn't mind when the ugly things landed on the cute things. For instance, in one of our most popular segments, we explode a sloth. Cut to a cute little mouse, sitting in a teacup and nibbling on a strawberry. Suddenly, whoosh! Chunks of flesh and a thick spray of blood land on the mouse. Not enough to hurt the little guy, of course, but just enough to frighten the living shit out of him. Boy, did the audience go nuts when they saw that one!"
Stuff that go Boom and Splode is currently on its 334th volume and new editions are set to come out daily, for the next fifteen years.
"We did some market research and found that people in general, and Americans in particular, like watching stuff explode. They blow stuff up all the time in action movies, but they waste money on stars' salaries and screenwriting and other nonsense. We figured we could make about a trillion dollars if we cut out things like dialogue and plot development and just got right to what people want to see: stuff that explodes. None of that extra bullshit. But it can't be just any explosions. For instance, test audiences didn't really like watching cute things explode. So we stayed away from blowing things up like babies, kittens, and sumo wrestlers. But no one really has a problem when we explode ugly things, so we stick to those. We've blown up plenty of hippos, alligators, and humor writers. Interestingly enough, people didn't mind when the ugly things landed on the cute things. For instance, in one of our most popular segments, we explode a sloth. Cut to a cute little mouse, sitting in a teacup and nibbling on a strawberry. Suddenly, whoosh! Chunks of flesh and a thick spray of blood land on the mouse. Not enough to hurt the little guy, of course, but just enough to frighten the living shit out of him. Boy, did the audience go nuts when they saw that one!"
Stuff that go Boom and Splode is currently on its 334th volume and new editions are set to come out daily, for the next fifteen years.
 |
| Ewww, an old lady and some birds. Splode them! (source) |
Comments